Yesterday, I went to Wal-Mart with my usually small shopping list. Most of it was food-related and I had to pick up a prescription for my wife at the same time. When I arrived, the parking lot was full, and I mean full. I had to park out on the perimeter; this was my first clue that all was not well (pun intended) in the store.
I was right. Never mind that the Governor of our great state, in his infinite wisdom has banned gatherings of over 500 people, after entering and navigating the aisles for a bit it was obvious there were thousands of people in the store. Shopping carts were filled to overflowing, the checkout lines were long and even the self-checkout lines had quite a few lined up.
Okay. Get my stuff and get out asap is my shopping mantra and has been for a long time. But yesterday, that would not happen. There was clearly a run on products. Obviously, the toilet paper and paper towel racks were cleaned out. There were 2 boxes of Kleenex left and I bought one because it was on my list. The bleach shelves were empty, ditto for the vinegar. The deli was closed and I heard some choice words as people walked by it. The bar soap shelves were cleaned off. Some food shelves were empty; it must be some sort of pasta panic set in because those shelves needed restocking also.
One of the reasons I have stopped going to Wal-Mart as often as I used to is the fact that they have instituted a program where you can call in a shopping list and their employees will pick it for you and even put it in your car when you arrive. And of course, the aisles were clogged full of those too. It was something to see.
I am happy to note most people were polite and decent; some even offered rumors on what stores had TP left. But I am sad to note that in times of crisis, there are always scalpers and they have seized the day. A quick visit on-line to eBay with a search for TP in my local mailing address revealed this:
Ah, toilet paper profiteers. $40 plus shipping (and tax, eBay now adds tax) for what is usually well under $10 at the store. The old saying of never let a good crisis go to waste (pun intended) is apropos here. The ironic words in that picture are at the bottom (tell us what you think). If I were to do that, eBay would probably ban me.
As I said in my opening statement, people are assholes (pun intended) and the run on TP shows that some rise above and beyond to the head of the pack. Congratulations, well done. One small step for man, and one smaller step for mankind.
In a few short weeks things will go back to normal, the stores will be restocked and life will seem normal again. In the meantime, we're going to have to suffer the assholes of life.
As a closing note, I have to say this whole thing has been overblown. No sports, schools are closed, St. Pats day parades are cancelled and the concert I have tickets for (since Xmas) has been rescheduled. BTW, can anybody tell me why toilet paper becomes such a valued commodity with a respiratory illness going around? What is the connection?
Does anybody really think that in this global economy, with the amount of people traveling every day that a germ can be contained? No, this will have it's run and be a memory in a few short months. More people will die and health care systems will be tested. History shows us the Spanish flu pandemic of 1918 and the black plague had their run and there was little people could do about it other than take the usual precautions. Even so, millions died.
But there is a lesson here: The next time you hear of a new virus or illness going around, run to your local store and clean the shelves before anybody else. That way, if you survive the doomsday predictions... and, if you're savvy, you can even pick up a few bucks doing it.
When the wagon stops in front of your door and you hear the words bring out yer dead being shouted in, then maybe it's time to panic. Until then, I'm going to live life as normal as possible.
One sheet at a time.
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